By Sam Amico

MINNESOTA, WHO ARE YOU?

I'm just not sure what to make of the Minnesota Timberwolves. And if you've seen the Timberwolves play, I bet you're not sure, either.

But how else are we supposed to feel?

I mean, the T-Wolves will look lovely against Lakers -- then gruesome against the Grizzlies.

They'll move the ball and take good shots on offense, and crash the boards and stick a hand in your face on defense -- then still lose.

They have arguably one the game's top five players in Kevin Garnett -- but can't get out of the first round of the playoffs.

And the worst part for Minnesota fans? Things aren't looking much different this year.

It looks like it will be another season of 45 wins and a first-round exit. It looks like Garnett will be awesome, while his teammates are still not-too-bad, but not good enough. It looks like Garnett won't get along very well with swingman Wally Szczerbiak and ... well, stop me if you've heard this before.

Don't misunderstand. This isn't intended to trash the T-Wolves. I love these guys. Really, I do. I think coach Flip Saunders is one the NBA's most underrated basketball minds, and with the exception of the Joe Smith fiasco, I like the job Kevin McHale has done as general manager.

I REALLY like Garnett, a 6-foot-11 forward who can pass, hit three-pointers, and send your shot into the 212th row. Garnett also loves to play, and I consider him to be a true superstar and great spokesmen for the league. And if you ask me, he has the best nickname in the entire NBA -- The Big Ticket.

Then there are guys like Szczerbiak, Anthony Peeler, and my personal favorite, point guard Troy Hudson -- who gets my vote for most underrated free-agent pickup of the offseason. Szczerbiak, who's been injured most of the year, is an All-Star. And Hudson and Peeler are the two best examples of the type of solid contributors that fill Minnesota's roster.

So I don't know what's wrong with the Wolves. The talent is there. So is the coaching. Sure, sometimes I wonder what has happened to Smith, although I suspect he became comfortable in his role as a completely average Joe, and stopped being passionate about basketball some time ago.

Remember when Smith and Garnett were expected to provide us with a lifetime of classic matchups after both were selected in the 1995 draft (Smith was picked first overall by Golden State; Garnett fifth by Minnesota)? Well, that never materialized, as the high hopes for Smith headed south by his fifth season, when he averaged a career-low 9.9 points per game.

Anyway, there's a reason the Timberwolves are so hard to figure. I just have no idea what that reason is.

If you think you have an idea, go ahead and e-mail me (amicoreport@hotmail.com). That way, we can keep talkin' T-Wolves.

LAID-BACK IN L.A.

If I'm a Lakers fan, I'm wondering when these guys are going to put it together. That's all I could think after watching Shaquille O'Neal, Kobe Bryant and the rest of the champs hold off Memphis in Los Angeles Dec. 3. And when I say "hold off," I mean the Grizzlies were in the game the entire way.

My question is, are the Lakers really confident enough to enter the playoffs as, say, a number 6 seed? I would hope not, because these Lakers haven't proven to me that they are truly one of the all-time great teams.

Their average play is especially troubling when you consider how much better the rest of the Western Conference is.

Having said all of that, it is extremely early, and I wouldn't be surprised to see the Lakers go on one of those 15-game winning streaks before the All-Star break. A lot depends on guys like Derek Fisher, Rick Fox, and Robert Horry, each of whom is off to his worst start in a long, long time.

COVERING MJ

Last season, the Washington Post assigned a beat reporter to cover Michael Jordan. That means the reporter, Michael Leahy, covered Jordan and only Jordan -- and not the rest of the Washington Wizards.

Well, apparently the Post isn't chronicling Jordan's every move this season, and that's too bad. I thoroughly enjoyed reading Leahy's work, mostly because it proved to me that you can be just as passionate about basketball at the age of 40 as you were at 18. The only difference, as Leahy's stories on Jordan made obvious, is that when you're 40, real life tends to get in the way. Great stuff, and I hope Leahy eventually writes a book (he says he's still undecided).

Speaking of books on Jordan, I mentioned a few weeks ago that I had picked up a copy of "One Last Shot: The Story of Michael Jordan's Comeback," by Mitchell Krugel. Well, I'm just about finished reading it, and I highly recommend it.

Granted, way too much has been written about Jordan already, but Krugel's book offers some neat new insights. Like Leahy did for the Post, Krugel shows the human side of a man who once seemed untouchable -- and how that man deals with no longer being the absolute best.

One last bit of MJ info: Did you know that only one reporter from a national media outlet covered the Wizards' opener in Toronto? No question, Michael Mania has definitely cooled off. That, of course, is only true of the media. The fans still care, as Washington continues to sell out nearly every arena it visits. Not bad for a team that lost 10 of its first 17 games.

LOTTERY LOWDOWN

Last week, reader Tom Goodall posed some questions about the odds of winning the NBA's draft lottery.

A lot of people went into great detail explaining this, and all it really takes is a little math. Here is what you need to know:

The team that finishes with the worst record has just a 25 percent chance of winning. And the last team with the worst record to actually win the lottery? The 1990 New Jersey Nets (and even so, all they got was Derrick Coleman).

But remember, the team with the worst record can draft no lower than third.

Personally, I say do away with the lottery and flip a coin between the two worst teams. I know, I know. This supposedly leads to teams losing games on purpose.

But does anybody really believe the New York Knicks would be worse if they suddenly started throwing games?

OTHER RANDOM THOUGHTS

-- Speaking of the lottery, one night after the Knicks beat Cleveland 125-93, the score was stuck on the Headline News ticker for more than 10 hours. In other words, no other scores flashed across the bottom of the screen. Bet the Cavs just loved that.

-- It's good to see that Voshon Lenard (Toronto) and Walt Williams (Dallas) have returned to the game as regular contributors. Did you know Williams' nickname is "The Wizard," and that many folks considered him to be the next Magic Johnson while Williams was in college at Maryland? Anyway, I love Lenard's game, and even though they have Vince Carter, it was Lenard who revived my interest in the Raptors this season. Yes, I need help.

-- I think the Raptors are a lot like the Timberwolves, in the sense that anything can happen with these guys. Lenny Wilkens may have more wins than any coach ever, but he's still often unappreciated. Who knows why. Anyway, if the Raptors can just get to the playoffs, we might see shades of two seasons ago, when they came within a game of reaching the Eastern Conference finals.

-- Sticking with the Raptors theme, Peter May of the Boston Globe recently said to check the fourth page of the Raptors media guide. I did, and under the heading, "Miscellaneous," it reads, "The Raptors media relations department encourages media members to write and say only nice things about the team and try not to hurt anyone's feelings." Sometimes, you find stuff that is too good to make up.

-- The Raptors will be happy to know that I am constantly criticized for being "too nice." Or as reader Dale Strong put it, "The official faceless mascot of the NBA."

-- Can you name the three charter members of the NBA that are still in existence? The answer later.

-- Sports Illustrated reported that Dallas forward Dirk Nowitzki has lived in the same two-bedroom apartment since his rookie year. Now there's a bit of information that should send the players' association into a frenzy.

-- Basketball Digest listed the all-time team for every NBA franchise in its January 2003 issue, which is now on shelves. It was an excellent idea and I strongly encourage you to check it out. It really is a fun read.

-- There is no reason that Houston rookie center Yao Ming should shoot less than 20 times per game. Steve Francis and Cuttino Mobley will have to start accepting the fact that they are the Rockets' second and third options, no questions asked. I don't care if Ming goes 6-of-25 from the floor -- Allen Iverson does it, and he's a foot-and-a-half shorter with worse passing skills. I love Iverson, so that's not a knock against him. It's just that the Rockets should have one theory -- get Ming the ball!

-- Utah's Karl Malone and Indiana's Reggie Miller have each had a scoreless game already this season. I'm feeling old.

-- Jimmy Jackson is a Sacramento King. I love it! But where were the Utah Jazz when Jackson was sitting at home for the first six weeks of the season?

-- The answer to the question about the NBA's three charter members that still exist is (drumroll, please): the Boston Celtics, New York Knicks, and Golden State (then Philadelphia) Warriors. The Philly Warriors, by the way, won the first NBA title in 1946-47.

YOUR E-MAILS

From Marcus Berger

I VEHEMENTLY disagree when you talk about Allen Iverson's or any other NBA player's personal lives being discussed. Going back to cultural anthropology in college, I learned that social derision is a vital part of societal enforcement of acceptable behavior. Therefore, every time some NBA player breaks a guy's jaw for scratching his car (Ruben Patterson), beats his wife in front of their kids (Patterson, Jason Kidd), runs up on his wife with a gun (AI), or shoots his limo driver and tries to get witnesses to lie about it(Jayson Williams), it is up to us -- the fans -- to say enough is enough. Your Christina ethic of "Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone," is admirable, but Sam, get real. This type of behavior is not tolerable from laymen and certainly not tolerable by pro athletes, whose talents and PR machines can turn them into false heroes.

(Marcus, for the most part, I agree with what you're saying. Obviously, spouse abusers should be punished to the fullest degree. And I agree that, yes, we should have the right to know whether or not we're rooting for a criminal who merely doubles as a basketball player. My point was, let's not convict an Allen Iverson before we know what happened -- which, it turns out, was nothing. Yet a lot of folks still seem angry with Iverson's "actions this summer," when there was no evidence and no conviction. So while it's true that being a pro athlete often excuses people from criminal behavior, it also has come to the point where many are accused of being guilty before having a chance to prove themselves innocent. But you're point is well-taken, and in my opinion, correct. Now, you should know that I've assigned several reporters to cover your every move for the next 7-10 years).

From Jason Patton

I completely agree with your thoughts regarding Iverson's off-court activities. Since I don't know the facts of the case, it's hard for me to judge him. But the fact remains that his every move is watched, scrutinized, criticized and sensationalized by the media. Everyone makes mistakes, but anonymity allows the general public to deal with its problems privately.

(Jason, thanks. That's what I was trying to say above, but your version was much smoother than mine).

From Enrique Arminana

You recently said that Shane Battier, Drew Gooden and Stromile Swift are the most important players for the Memphis Grizzlies -- that the Grizzlies should keep only those three and "get rid of everyone else." You've got to be kidding! What about Pau Gasol? Battier is a good role player, but not the kind of guy whom you should build a team around. Gooden is tough and has potential, but right now, his only low post move is that weird little hook. Swift is a great athlete, but not very smart on the court. Instead, Gasol and Michael Dickerson are the most important Grizzlies.

(Enrique, you're probably right -- although I wonder about Gasol's passion. Everything comes so naturally for him, I wonder if it will effect his work ethic. He also seems to be a little bit selfish. Still, after giving it some more thought, I would take Gasol over Swift. So please allow me a mulligan on that one).

From Ryan Heimberger

I completely agree with your statement about too many dunking highlights. I realize that, as a 15-year old NBA fan, my age group is the reason for the a-dunk-here-and-a-dunk-there highlights. But you can give me a well-played fundamental basketball game over the kind of game that currently dominates the NBA, the look-at-me jamfests with guys like Darius Miles going five-of-18 from the floor, with all five being dunks.

(Ryan, thanks for the refreshing look. Good stuff).

SAM'S SLAMS

Reader Kelly Clark recently e-mailed an awesome list of NBA stuff, and I hope to squeeze it in soon. Here's a taste: Clark gave Sacramento's Hedo Turkoglu the award for NBA's worst hair. "It looks like he goes to the salon and says, 'Make me as ugly as possible,''' Clark wrote. ... Bill Walton wasn't nearly as kind on ESPN.com. "I'm not a big fan of (Clippers center) Michael Olowokandi," Walton said. "He doesn't like basketball. He's like Shawn Bradley. He's playing for the money. And there has never been a great basketball player who did it for the money." ... Jeff Trepagnier was named NBDL player of the month for November. Trepagnier averaged 21 points per game for Asheville. He played in Cleveland last season, and I'm still convinced he belongs in the NBA. ... As for the CBA, Rockford's David Harrison leads the league in scoring (27.7 ppg). Meanwhile, no less than Oliver Miller of Gary leads the league in rebounding.

CONTACT ME

E-mail questions and comments to me at amicoreport@hotmail.com. I will try to answer questions in the newsletter, but you must include your full name.

HAVE A GREAT DAY!