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I would be willing to guess that the lotion of choice for Stacey Augmon is Cocoa Butter. See, Coca Butter works great on things like ashy elbows, dry feet, and camera lenses. Camera lenses? This is where the record player screeches to a halt and brings the dancing to a stop….

When did the Orlando Magic become the bad news bears? Hedo is bumping his ugly. (No I didn’t? Oh, yes I did.) Tony Battie leaves the bench to go on the court during an altercation. Attention Steve Francis: get over Mobley, he is not going to be calling you in the morning - he is on to bigger and better things. Doug Christie wants to take his ball and go home. The only thing we are missing is the one dude from the Dave Chappelle show doing the robot in the middle of the floor.

The rookies are actually the best behaved on this rough and tumble team. Next thing you know Grant Hill is going to get some tat’s, grow a goat, and change his nickname to “Hate You!” It’s all only a matter of time for this motley crew. It worked for the Red Sox, can it work for the Magic? I would say no! The Red Sox have coaching, management, and pride; all things that seem to be missing from our Orlando Magic.

Personal note: I have one set of tickets remaining for the Magic’s last home game of the season. At the beginning of the year I saw this as a deciding game for the first spot in the playoff race. Now I have a prediction. Shaq will have a mystery ailment, Dwayne Wade will get a stomach flu and the Magic will win by three, securing yet another good draft pick. I will trade these tickets for Channel 9’s, “The 2004 Hurricane Season Review’, now on DVD and available at Albertson’s for a limited time.

There is a positive recent development, too. DeShawn Stevenson is trying to appeal to Orlando’s large Latin population by displaying his soccer skills. Good thinking DeShawn, you’re the man!

...the fans want to dance again, put the record back on, and let them dance. But maybe the dance is over and we don’t even know it. Tampa Magic?

Fan editorial by Ed O’Donnell - You know I can bring it because I am the 5th best player on my men’s YMCA league team.