How to take control of your own life, and add order to it?

[russwest0]

I'm at the point in my life where I'm too tired of being a kid but too scared of being a true adult because I'm not there yet.

All that I want is to be independent. To have my own career, living comfortably in my own home, and somewhere nice that I enjoy living.

But I'm not there yet. I'm in college, living with friends, and working a part time job to get by. And for whatever reason, I'm getting caught up with being lazy, not doing homework, just laying around, reading, listening to music, watching tv, sports, etc, being a lazy piece of shit.

All that I wonder, is, if anyone else on ISH can relate. Did anyone else grow up feeling irritated with so many things that were out of their control, but now lives a nice, comfortable, independent life where they have total control?

All that I ask from those people is, how does one go from being a lazy, undisciplined loser to being a successful and independent individual? I know that I can do better than I am in some areas such as: school, work, getting enough sleep, eating healthy, staying active, not doing drugs, etc, regardless of if people around me think that I am managing everything well. It's just right now I'm caught in a weird loop where I don't see any way of what I want actually happening, because I don't quite know what I want, other than true and personal freedom in a way that makes me happy and keeps me financially safe.

It's just like on one hand, I love my friends and don't want to tell them that I need to move out because, they are my friends and will give me shit for it, but at the same time living in an environment where there can be constant loud noise in the AM, where there are drugs being done often, where fast food is a staple in the diets of everyone in the house, etc. you know, it just doesn't seem like this environment is helping me progress.

But on the other hand, what am I going to do? Move in with say, my mother, a woman who is always mad about something, and try to finish out college in that environment?

All I know is that depression can be a suffocating thing and that so many young kids around my age, particularly those trying to get through college, are prone to it. I myself have a cousin who I was close with who was going through a really nice college, was really intelligent, had a beautiful 6 year old daughter, and yet, the guy overdoses on drugs and dies because he's too embarrassed to admit that he has a problem and needs to find ways to restore order to his life.

I'm not saying that I'm depressed, I'm just saying that I am in an environment where I don't see my mental state of being lazy and unorganized getting better, but none of my options appear to be sufficent. Since this seems like a normal problem that many successful adults have probably faced before, I ask trying to obtain some wisdom, What do I do ISH?

[CeltsGarlic]

Find a good GF.

[fiddy]

[DCL]

you sound like the fat girl who can't stop eating but is asking, "so how do i stop being fat?"

some people dream. some people make things happen.

ask yourself, who do you want to be? you are just a dreamer now.

[LiLharvard]

buy a dog

[pauk]

[russwest0]

buy a dog

can't. whoever I live with won't allow it.

though I love dogs.

[gts]

Don't overthink this stuff...

Make a plan, move forward knowing and accepting the plan has a 90% chance of changing.. be flexible, have fun but always keep your eye on your ultimate goal

[russwest0]

Don't overthink this stuff...

Make a plan, move forward knowing and accepting the plan has a 90% chance of changing.. be flexible, have fun but always keep your eye on your ultimate goal

Yeah I definitely have a huge problem with overthinking things and confusing my self for no goddamn reason.

Sometimes I feel like I have ADHD because say if I'm reading for homework, I'll read a paragraph of a book and then start to wander off into my own thoughts and get distracted before having to re-read shit again.

Really I think the problem is that I don't have motivation. As a way to help solve that problem I've been making lists of things I absolutely have to get done each day (even though it doesn't always happen, like last night I planned on doing all this HW but took some shrooms instead), and I got a dry erase calendar board where I'm going to outline my work and school schedule and then go through and put in times where I HAVE to go to the Library and get shit done.

I'm so frustrated with myself.

[Yoda]

I'm at the point in my life where I'm too tired of being a kid but too scared of being a true adult because I'm not there yet.

All that I want is to be independent. To have my own career, living comfortably in my own home, and somewhere nice that I enjoy living.

But I'm not there yet. I'm in college, living with friends, and working a part time job to get by. And for whatever reason, I'm getting caught up with being lazy, not doing homework, just laying around, reading, listening to music, watching tv, sports, etc, being a lazy piece of shit.

All that I wonder, is, if anyone else on ISH can relate. Did anyone else grow up feeling irritated with so many things that were out of their control, but now lives a nice, comfortable, independent life where they have total control?

All that I ask from those people is, how does one go from being a lazy, undisciplined loser to being a successful and independent individual? I know that I can do better than I am in some areas such as: school, work, getting enough sleep, eating healthy, staying active, not doing drugs, etc, regardless of if people around me think that I am managing everything well. It's just right now I'm caught in a weird loop where I don't see any way of what I want actually happening, because I don't quite know what I want, other than true and personal freedom in a way that makes me happy and keeps me financially safe.

It's just like on one hand, I love my friends and don't want to tell them that I need to move out because, they are my friends and will give me shit for it, but at the same time living in an environment where there can be constant loud noise in the AM, where there are drugs being done often, where fast food is a staple in the diets of everyone in the house, etc. you know, it just doesn't seem like this environment is helping me progress.

But on the other hand, what am I going to do? Move in with say, my mother, a woman who is always mad about something, and try to finish out college in that environment?

All I know is that depression can be a suffocating thing and that so many young kids around my age, particularly those trying to get through college, are prone to it. I myself have a cousin who I was close with who was going through a really nice college, was really intelligent, had a beautiful 6 year old daughter, and yet, the guy overdoses on drugs and dies because he's too embarrassed to admit that he has a problem and needs to find ways to restore order to his life.

I'm not saying that I'm depressed, I'm just saying that I am in an environment where I don't see my mental state of being lazy and unorganized getting better, but none of my options appear to be sufficent. Since this seems like a normal problem that many successful adults have probably faced before, I ask trying to obtain some wisdom, What do I do ISH?

dr;tl. Summarize you must.

[barito]

You are a product of your environment. Sounds like you need some new friends, and a new place to live. Moving back in with your mom might be frustrating at start but just remember that it is only temporary. Find friends that actually motivate you, and challenge you to be a better person.

[russwest0]

You are a product of your environment. Sounds like you need some new friends, and a new place to live. Moving back in with your mom might be frustrating at start but just remember that it is only temporary. Find friends that actually motivate you, and challenge you to be a better person.

You know, I agree with this. Not all of my friends I hang around right now are bad though, it's more about the environment as a whole. We have four people that live in a house but it seems like there's always like 6-7 people here at any given time, if not more. One of them doesn't live here but he's here basically every single day because he has absolutely nothing better to do, but he's by far the loudest of the group. As a guest he'll wake someone up from being loud after midnight like once a week

And then you have one of the guys girlfriends who has all but moved in here, leaving all her stuff here, doing laundry here, etc.

I'd say two to three of them I really connect with in terms of sharing the same goals, having the same outlook on life, being true friends, etc. Whether they feel the same way or not, IDK.

It's just hard to "find new friends" and shit.

[BigBoss]

[IamRAMBO24]

I'm at the point in my life where I'm too tired of being a kid but too scared of being a true adult because I'm not there yet.

All that I want is to be independent. To have my own career, living comfortably in my own home, and somewhere nice that I enjoy living.

But I'm not there yet. I'm in college, living with friends, and working a part time job to get by. And for whatever reason, I'm getting caught up with being lazy, not doing homework, just laying around, reading, listening to music, watching tv, sports, etc, being a lazy piece of shit.

All that I wonder, is, if anyone else on ISH can relate. Did anyone else grow up feeling irritated with so many things that were out of their control, but now lives a nice, comfortable, independent life where they have total control?

All that I ask from those people is, how does one go from being a lazy, undisciplined loser to being a successful and independent individual? I know that I can do better than I am in some areas such as: school, work, getting enough sleep, eating healthy, staying active, not doing drugs, etc, regardless of if people around me think that I am managing everything well. It's just right now I'm caught in a weird loop where I don't see any way of what I want actually happening, because I don't quite know what I want, other than true and personal freedom in a way that makes me happy and keeps me financially safe.

It's just like on one hand, I love my friends and don't want to tell them that I need to move out because, they are my friends and will give me shit for it, but at the same time living in an environment where there can be constant loud noise in the AM, where there are drugs being done often, where fast food is a staple in the diets of everyone in the house, etc. you know, it just doesn't seem like this environment is helping me progress.

But on the other hand, what am I going to do? Move in with say, my mother, a woman who is always mad about something, and try to finish out college in that environment?

All I know is that depression can be a suffocating thing and that so many young kids around my age, particularly those trying to get through college, are prone to it. I myself have a cousin who I was close with who was going through a really nice college, was really intelligent, had a beautiful 6 year old daughter, and yet, the guy overdoses on drugs and dies because he's too embarrassed to admit that he has a problem and needs to find ways to restore order to his life.

I'm not saying that I'm depressed, I'm just saying that I am in an environment where I don't see my mental state of being lazy and unorganized getting better, but none of my options appear to be sufficent. Since this seems like a normal problem that many successful adults have probably faced before, I ask trying to obtain some wisdom, What do I do ISH?

Laziness is actually what you are being conditioned to be. Being in school so long is making you docile. You no longer have any motivation because it is killing your creative side. If you kill creativity, you kill passion; the death of passion is the root of procrastination.

Break away from the slave mentality and be your own creator. Education is the single biggest reason why we have so many losers in society. If it truly works, then everybody would be successful. Period. If you work at a job for over 10 years, you would be a professional at it. It is sad some kids can't even get a job at Mcdonald's after 12 years of education.

[IamRAMBO24]

Listen to this and change your life. It is the first motivational book and the ONLY one worth a damn.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytJCF7bcs8k

Your welcome.