Funniest NBA quotes

[Harison]

"After being treated for a kidney stone, Lakers coach Phil Jackson said "When the anesthesiologist leaned over me, he said "We named your kidney stone Kobe because it's not passing."

"The last time we won here, Snoop Dogg was still a pup."
- Rudy Tomjanovic, on the Rockets playing in Orlando.

New York Knicks fan: "Hey, Damon...you can come here and live in my house."
Damon Stoudamire: "I'd live in your doghouse to get out of this shit."

"Now, if a player does not have an altercation on or off the court once each month, we fine him. I've tried to get this into the press, but people won't pay attention. And, the guys who are our top four scorers, each of them will be required once every two months to appear on MTV. And the guys who shoot the worst free throws over a one-month period, the next time we have a TV game, they are required to look into the camera and beat their chests after they make a good play. I think then we will have a little bit different reputation."
- Gregg Popovich.

"I wasn't impressed with the way he coached tonight, either."
- Jason Terry, after Hawks coach Terry Stotts said he wasn't impressed with the way JT had played.

"I would compare Rod to classical music - it just flows, a steady stream of melody, real free-flowing, something mixed up with a lot of tempo. Troy's like rock and roll, or rap. He comes out energetic, keeps you on your feet. At certain times you need that, and at certain times you need the classical music."
- Kevin Garnett, comparing Rod Strickland to Troy Hudson.

"They better not put me in the All -Star Game. I won't shoot, but I'll dominate that easy game. I'll be playing hard defense. I'll be foulin'. I'll be flagrant fouling. Everyone will be like, 'What are you doing?'"
- Ron Artest.

"He's white normally, but he's really white now."
- Larry Brown, on Keith Van Horn being sick.

"Isiah Thomas: "I've got some bad news. We're trading you to Phoenix."
Antonio McDyess: "What's the bad news?"

- Kobe Bryant's wife noticed Karl Malone's cowboy boots and asked him, "Hey, Cowboy, what are you hunting for?"
"I'm hunting for little Mexican girls."


"I've got to stop this. My entourages are getting entourages."
- Jalen Rose, on the trouble finding tickets for everyone when he returns to Detroit.

"Both teams played hard."
- Rasheed Wallace's answer to every question in a post game interview, for which he received a massive fine.

"Shaq does it all the time...."
- Kobe Bryant to the arresting officers in his rape trial.

- Charles Barkley, when asked if he had any regrets after throwing a fan out a window at a bar.
"I regret we weren't on a higher floor."

"So, which one of you guys is going to come in second?"
- Larry Bird, in the locker room before the first three point contest. He won.

[me_]

I don't remember that one from Artest but it sounds just like him

[AJ2k8]

Funny stuff

[strike]

"After being treated for a kidney stone, Lakers coach Phil Jackson said "When the anesthesiologist leaned over me, he said "We named your kidney stone Kobe because it's not passing."

"The last time we won here, Snoop Dogg was still a pup."
- Rudy Tomjanovic, on the Rockets playing in Orlando.

New York Knicks fan: "Hey, Damon...you can come here and live in my house."
Damon Stoudamire: "I'd live in your doghouse to get out of this shit."

"Now, if a player does not have an altercation on or off the court once each month, we fine him. I've tried to get this into the press, but people won't pay attention. And, the guys who are our top four scorers, each of them will be required once every two months to appear on MTV. And the guys who shoot the worst free throws over a one-month period, the next time we have a TV game, they are required to look into the camera and beat their chests after they make a good play. I think then we will have a little bit different reputation."
- Gregg Popovich.

"I wasn't impressed with the way he coached tonight, either."
- Jason Terry, after Hawks coach Terry Stotts said he wasn't impressed with the way JT had played.

"I would compare Rod to classical music - it just flows, a steady stream of melody, real free-flowing, something mixed up with a lot of tempo. Troy's like rock and roll, or rap. He comes out energetic, keeps you on your feet. At certain times you need that, and at certain times you need the classical music."
- Kevin Garnett, comparing Rod Strickland to Troy Hudson.

"They better not put me in the All -Star Game. I won't shoot, but I'll dominate that easy game. I'll be playing hard defense. I'll be foulin'. I'll be flagrant fouling. Everyone will be like, 'What are you doing?'"
- Ron Artest.

"He's white normally, but he's really white now."
- Larry Brown, on Keith Van Horn being sick.

"Isiah Thomas: "I've got some bad news. We're trading you to Phoenix."
Antonio McDyess: "What's the bad news?"

- Kobe Bryant's wife noticed Karl Malone's cowboy boots and asked him, "Hey, Cowboy, what are you hunting for?"
"I'm hunting for little Mexican girls."


"I've got to stop this. My entourages are getting entourages."
- Jalen Rose, on the trouble finding tickets for everyone when he returns to Detroit.

"Both teams played hard."
- Rasheed Wallace's answer to every question in a post game interview, for which he received a massive fine.

"Shaq does it all the time...."
- Kobe Bryant to the arresting officers in his rape trial.

- Charles Barkley, when asked if he had any regrets after throwing a fan out a window at a bar.
"I regret we weren't on a higher floor."

"So, which one of you guys is going to come in second?"
- Larry Bird, in the locker room before the first three point contest. He won.

quality.

love artest's one

[markymark]

"Shaq does it all the time..."

GOLD! Never knew about this!

[strike]

"Shaq does it all the time..."

GOLD! Never knew about this!

lol i know that one cracked me up

[Harison]

"You know, softball is the other sport I do besides basketball."

[miamiandorlando]

"After being treated for a kidney stone, Lakers coach Phil Jackson said "When the anesthesiologist leaned over me, he said "We named your kidney stone Kobe because it's not passing."

"I wasn't impressed with the way he coached tonight, either."
- Jason Terry, after Hawks coach Terry Stotts said he wasn't impressed with the way JT had played.

.

[Pointguard]

Good Stuff!

[Crown&Coke]

"Kids, do drugs"-Scott Pollard while sitting on the bench as the camera breezes by him, who then subsequently got fined and apologized.

[Nash]

"When Micheal Jordan scored 69 points, I knew I'd always remember it as the night me and Micheal combined for 70 points"
-Former Bull Stacey King

[Harison]

Cops pull Rasheed and some of his fellow Trail blazers over and asks him if they have any more weed (cuz he smelled weed) "nope, we smoked it all up."

[rodman91]

[QUOTE=Harison]Cops pull Rasheed and some of his fellow Trail blazers over and asks him if they have any more weed (cuz he smelled weed) "nope, we smoked it all up."

[HEAT111]

"Hey this is Charles Barkely...I hope you're enjoying the NBA playoffs on TNT...and I hope you've enjoyed my T-Mobile fav 5 list...I'm a Dumbass."

Charles Barkely reading from the camera.

[Crown&Coke]

"Hey this is Charles Barkely...I hope you're enjoying the NBA playoffs on TNT...and I hope you've enjoyed my T-Mobile fav 5 list...I'm a Dumbass."

Charles Barkely reading from the camera.

I saw that! that was pretty hilarious at the time. Please youtube that if you haven't seen it, because it is awesome.